Dear Jen,
Today is here. 4 years since you died.
Last night as I walked the dogs after dinner, pulling Daydream in the wagon, I stared at the cloudless sky and felt the dread of today wash over me. I sometimes still can’t comprehend that you are gone. When I stop and think about it…that’s when it really hits me. I live out my days doing the mundane and ordinary crap and I am alone in this world without you and it’s all so blah sometimes. I do fun things and smile and laugh and I think about you and I keep on keepin’ on.
My move is complete and I am happier than I have been in years. Today we had a play date with a new friend and it was really fun. Sunshine and Daydream had a great time with Nora and I enjoyed meeting someone who I’ve wanted to connect with for years. We talked about you.
I still miss the hell out of you though. I don’t know how to say it any other way, how many times I can say the same thing. Your death is the worst thing that has ever happened to me, this day 4 years ago was the worst day of my life.
I love you and miss you every day. You are always in my thoughts and my heart.
Love, me.
August 25, 2011 at 5:23 pm |
Thinking about you at this difficult time of year. Our anniversary of losing Eric is next week, and the dread grows every day. I am able to get through big chunks of time without being dragged down by his death…and then it hits me hard when I least expect it. I’m glad to hear that you are feeling settled and finding your feet out there. I hope leaving that old place behind helps you heal some more.