I live with my wonderful husband on the west coast and we are beyond thrilled to be back here.

We have 3 dogs and 3 beautiful kiddos.  I adore my babies, they are beautiful and wonderful,  my everything, my heart and my soul.  I can’t imagine life without them.   They are a gift that I cherish each day.

My older sister was diagnosed with metastatic colon cancer, stage IV, in May, 2004. For three years after her diagnosis she fought as hard as anyone could, traveling the country for treatment, visiting various doctors to expand her treatment base and never allowing the disease to define her life. After her original diagnosis she had a liver resection and was on various different chemo drugs. Remission always remained a hope, a goal.

My sister Jen died on Saturday, August 25, 2007.  She was 35.  In the end it was her body, which had tried so hard to fight the disease, that ultimately just gave out on her. Although her will to fight and live was so strong, her tired body just couldn’t do it anymore.  Her stupid fucking cancer had spread to her lungs and grew out of control and she was slowly suffocating.

I miss her so much but at least I know she’s not in pain anymore. The last weeks of her life were absolute torture as she struggled for each breath.

Jen left behind her husband and a beautiful  daughter, many friends, my heartbroken parents and me and my husband. We gave up our own life to be able to help her live hers and as much as I always hated the place we lived and that life there, I don’t regret my decision and I never will.

I love warm weather, sunny days, and the beach.

Most days I shied away from human contact.  I kept to myself and preferred to be alone…after 7 years, it became a way of life.

Thankfully, those days are over.  We now live in a place we adore, a beautiful, warm, sunny, breezy location and I haven’t felt this happy in years.  My children are thriving and I am so grateful for this chance to live my life again.  I know Jen would want this for me.


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